My yowoto post for the week: Ten things they didn’t tell you about parenting a tween

There really should have been a manual warning you about all of this!

The offspring, as you would definitely know, if you’ve been reading this column for a while now, is no longer a cute under 10, but has moved swiftly and surely into the realm of tweendom which comes loaded with all the baggage of riding the first waves of burgeoning hormones, but is still tinged with the innocence of a childhood yet to be shed completely.

From non-stop giggling over “seks” jokes which he can’t yet understand but has picked up from the bigger boys in the playground and knows he must repeat at top volume in a crowded supermarket to get himself all the attention he needs while his mother looks beseechingly at the tiles under her feet to open up and swallow her right now or hoping against hope that this could be the moment she finally perfects self-combustion, to slipping a terrified hand into mamma’s when crossing a terrifying junction of honking traffic, the tween is a mass of bravado and fear, of precociousness and innocence, of contradictions that keep redefining how one parents every single day, until one is reduced, as I am, to now parenting by wire.
Read the rest of the post here.

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